I Brush My Teeth to That Sh*t!

funnyordie:

11 Funniest Lines from Roger Ebert’s Reviews of Bad Movies

We lost a treasure today, but he left us with these gems.

RIP @ebertchicago It was always fun to see him really go IN on a movie (or politician for that matter). 

Whoo!

(Source: get-right-with-mike)

TRUE. SHIT.

"You are – or soon will be – uniquely situated to use the power of the law, as well as your own gifts and knowledge, to help build a more fair, more equal, and more just society. And you have not only the power, but – I believe – the solemn responsibility, to do precisely that: to safeguard the rights and freedoms of everyone in this country, and to carry on the critical but unfinished work that lies ahead."

- Attorney General Eric Holder, addressing the LGBT Bar Association’s annual Lavender Law Conference  (via benppollack) -

gaaah!! #highschool

wow… that’s good.

drunkonstevphen:

Stephen: “Must be nice. Rick Santorum understands the real American dream that if you work hard enough, your children can have fewer opportunities that you did.”

I don’t know whether I should be more upset that he thinks people are so stupid that he can blatantly condescend to them OR that they are so stupid as to cheer for him while he is doing it. #Santorum is an asshole.

(Source: drunkonstephen)

raingel:

My grandparents’ church is crazy!

OH SHIT. bwahahahahaha! #crazy

"‘I’m bored’ is a useless thing to say. You live in a great, big, vast world that you’ve seen none percent of. Even the inside of your own mind is endless. It goes on forever, inwardly — you understand? The fact the you’re alive is amazing. So you don’t get to be bored."

- LOUIS C.K., to his kids, on Louie (via inothernews) -

"When you are down and out something always turns up - and it is usually the noses of your friends"

- Orson Welles (via kelvinmartian) -

LOL ALREADY!

(Source: lmportant)

"I consider that my work won’t be finished until I’m dead and buried, and I hope that’s a long, long time."

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John Lennon, interview with RKO Radio, December 8, 1980 (via mclennon-)

Wow, that sucks… 

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Ohhhhh True Shit!! 

(Source: mochacafe)